


Restraint

by melwil



Category: Mary Russell - Laurie R. King
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-10
Updated: 2011-04-10
Packaged: 2017-10-17 21:04:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/181159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/melwil/pseuds/melwil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Russell holds herself back</p>
            </blockquote>





	Restraint

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted in 2006

The stone house is filled with silent echoes.

I wander, day and night, from room to room. There's a heavy book in my hand – a prop rather than an item of learning. I stare at empty rooms, making long lists of things that need to be done.

I lurk outside the closed door, daring myself to open it.

There are visitors. I tell myself it was inevitable; that once the news filtered out, nothing would be able to keep them away. I receive them as gracefully as I can – considering the circumstances – though I know none of them would be brave enough to complain.

Mrs Hudson shuffles past me, a tray in her hands and a smile on her face – despite her sad eyes. I open the door for her, keeping my gaze downwards, unwilling to let my eyes follow her inside. I hear mumbled voices and a muffled groan, and I desperately ignore the overwhelming urge to run away.

She returns to me, closing the door with a gentle click. "He's asking for you."

I knew it. I knew it the whole time. I was just pretending when I tried to convince myself of anything else. "I'll try."

She pats my hand. "Good."

He is shrunken, alien, completely changed. I sit next to him, silently, as I wait for him to recognise me.

He turns his head. "Russell."

I stop myself from jumping out of the chair. "Holmes."

He wraps his long fingers around my wrist and I force myself to look at him.

"Holmes . . ." I whisper, a note of desperation edging its way from my mouth.

He shakes his head. "Have you eaten?"

I can't bear the way his eyes focus and falter. "I'll be fine."

He coughs. "You've never been very good at looking after yourself."

Coming from him, the statement is ludicrous, almost comical, and it's difficult to hide my laugh. "I'm fine."


End file.
